An afternoon walk with Scott and Kai

Well I never did write much about Betsie's death on Feb 27th. Betsie and Scott are from Akron, OH and Dave met both of them when he was in grad school. Scott traveled out West with Dave during field camp when he was getting his masters. Betsie and Scott moved out to Portland a year after we moved here and thus had been friends sense. Betsie referred to our group of friends as the 'orphans' those of us in Portland without family. Thus our gatherings are often and our holidays are filled with friends more so than family since there is distance between us and family (the same with our friends).

Betsie and Scott have been together over 20 years - Betsie had Kai on January 12, 2009 - Kai was born with (not sure of the proper name now) switched heart valves thus had to have major heart surgery a week after he was born (the heart surgery was successful and Kai's been healthy and will grow up to be just perfect)... 2 weeks later he was finally at home with Betsie and Scott. One week later Betsie was taken to the emergency (stomach problems) and ended up having her colon and part of her intestine removed - the dreaded news it was cancer (carcinoid cancer - a slow growing cancer (tumor)) and it was in her liver. Betsie went through some different treatments, chemo and had liver surgery on Dec 12, 2009. The surgery was successful and they were able to get 90+% of the tumors and she would have to continue hormone shots... Betsie really never recovered from the surgery, some other health issues came up and then finally on Monday, Feb. 22 Betsie was omitted to the hospital and was very dehydrated... by Tuesday her kidneys weren't functioning correctly, her legs and stomach held much of the fluids and the doctors were trying to figure it out. Wednesday they took Cat-scan and that late afternoon they were told Betsie's liver was all cancer and it was throughout her stomach cavity. Thursday the doctors said there was nothing more they could do. Betsie's body was shutting down fast... Friday they were able to get hospice involved and we got Betsie home and she passed a way just after sunrise on Saturday morning.

Its a sad story, Betsie was such a gentle and kind soul - always positive, smart and a funny sense of humor and only 39 years old. Bailey loves Betsie - and it's been difficult to explain to a 3 year old. 2 weeks after her death and a few explanations from both Dave and I, tonight Dave was talking to Scott on the phone and Bailey wanted to talk to him - she was very adamant about talking to him. She took the phone and said hello and 'where's Betsie' and she kept asking over and over, 'Scott - where's Betsie'. It was awkward - Dave was trying to get the phone from her she got really upset and of course Scott was upset on the other end... so strange and sad and we again explained the best way we could.

We all celebrated Betsie's life last Saturday - and will continue celebrating her life yearly. Betsie's birthday is the end of the month and we're all wondering what we should do? Next year we will start the tradition, 'Betsiefest Northwest' - A Life Celebration. Where people, music and food come together.